Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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