Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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