I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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