After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize