best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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