Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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