I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
