drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize
