dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
