Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
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