I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
then he tried to convert me to islam
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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