Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
