he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
