Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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