So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Little spoons don't ask big questions
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
