ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
