woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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