Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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