Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
