i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I will be naked everywhere
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
