4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
