He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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