drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize