waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize