just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize