I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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