I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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