Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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