whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize