I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
