One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
