Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
