You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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