yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
