i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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