did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
