it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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