Christians are straight up FREAKS
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize