a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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