Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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