Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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