We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
