And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
