booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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