Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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