btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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