i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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