he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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