Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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