Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
