Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
